The Filthy Truth by Andrew Dice Clay & David Ritz

Author:Andrew Dice Clay & David Ritz [Clay, Andrew Dice & Ritz, David]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Biography & Autobiography, Rich & Famous, Humor, General, Topic, Adult
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Published: 2014-11-11T06:00:00+00:00

EVERYTHING GOES RIGHT

IT WAS 1988—A decade after my debut at Pips—and it was shaping up to be the biggest year of my life. Even though Crime Story wasn’t picked up for a third season, my appearance as a cast member had given me a boost. I was also featured in a movie called Casual Sex? with Lea Thompson and Victoria Jackson where I played Vinny, a sexy thuggish guy who found his feelings and went around saying, “I’m the beast from the east. I’m a wild crazy beast. I’m the Vin Man.” When the producer, Ivan Reitman, saw what the Vin Man was doing on-screen, he rewrote the script, turned me into the star, and changed the ending so that I went off into the sunset with Lea Thompson. Professionally, I was in good shape. Personally, my relationship with Trini was going great guns. When it came to women, I was no longer the crazy man I once had been. At least I told myself that. I told myself that the reality of having a beautiful family life was right around the corner. Trini and I were living together in an apartment in Hollywood.

On the night that Nothing Goes Right aired we were at home. We had a few friends over, and during the show we were sitting on the couch holding hands. Trini was laughing louder than anyone. After the show I told Trini and my pals I needed to go for a walk. I needed to be by myself.

It was a Saturday night in Hollywood like any other. Bumper-to-bumper traffic, music blaring from the cars and clubs that lined the Strip. As I made my way to the Store, I was smoking my cigarette and savoring the moment. I was about to break through the show business barrier. I was about to achieve what I had always wanted—recognition and fame. I couldn’t remember feeling happier.

• • •

The special was the tinder that started my full-on inferno. I was playing Chuckles, a comedy club in Long Island, when Dennis Arfa, the greatest agent in the world, came in to see me. Dennis represented Rodney. He had been there the night of Nothing Goes Right. Rodney was actually the only comic on his roster. The other artists were Metallica, Joe Cocker, and Billy Joel.

Arfa was a complete hipster, a guy who had the balls to leave William Morris to do his own thing. The Morris office had been representing me for years for movies and TV, but not for personal appearances.

“Diceman, baby!” he said to me after the show. “I brought the papers.”

“What papers?”

“I’m signing you.”

“You are?”

“Tonight, baby, right now. I see your future, and it’s all green. The minute you go on sale, it’s like checkers, sweetheart. One jump, done. We’re sold out. Just like that.”

Naturally I was flattered, but I was also consulting with my father, who, now that I was taking off like a rocket, had become more involved in managing me. There was no one else I trusted more.

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